Shit Bartenders Mixologists Say

Okay, before anyone gets their drawers in a wad … it’s a perfectly good word, and I’m not going to bowdlerize it with asterisks or substitute something* like “shoot.” If I did your mind would still fill in the actual word; as George Carlin wisely said, “‘Shoot’ is ‘shit’ with two ‘O’s.” Now … let’s move on.

There’s been a meme going around YouTube, Facebook and other segments of the Intarnets lately: videos entitled something like “Shit __________ Say.” Fill in the blank with guys, girls, single girls, black girls, gay guys, vegans, project managers … you name it. I’ve been ignoring most of them, until one came along that I couldn’t ignore. Because maybe 50 of my friends have forwarded this around, and … because it’s hilarious.

Those of you who are bartenders or cocktail geeks, c’mon … I suspect you’ve been caught saying at least one, and probably more, of these things. Ladies and gentlemen, I bring you “Shit Bartenders Say.”

(“I’m a mixologist.“)

Er, sorry.


Adding some icing to that cake, mixologist bartender Derek Brown, proprietor of The Passenger in Washington, D.C., ran some “Shit Bartenders Mixologists Say” cocktail specials the other night …

Photo courtesy of Derek Brown. Click to embiggen.

Brilliant. The fourth one nearly made me spray my tasty beverage onto my monitor.

I love how the community is serious about what we do, but don’t take ourselves too seriously. Now, would you care for a drink? Hey, I’m really into amaro …


(* – Why is it that you can say “crap” on TV but you can’t say “shit?” They mean exactly the same thing. Sigh. People are so stupid.)


2 Responses to “Shit Bartenders Mixologists Say”

  1. Carol Penn-Romine said:

    Jan 20, 12 at 12:36 pm

    Trying to make the YooHoo-tini garnished with pickled Tootsie Roll come out my nose, Dude?!

    (As for censorship, why is it on tv that when someone says “asshole” you hear “ass” but they bleep “hole?” “Ass” is always going to be at least PG-13, but “hole?” That has too many G-rated uses to bleep. Never been able to figure that one out.)



  2. Shari said:

    Jan 20, 12 at 4:31 pm

    CHUUUUUUUUCK! Welcome back. I have missed you.